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Love and visibility

To share the joy of a love of a GLBT type is a gift we receive and give to others. If we instead subordinate our love to others’ approval, what kind of life are we going to live?

di , Gay.tv, 17 luglio 2004

Translation by Eddie Polico

We are all asked to be witnesses of love. We often suppress our will to love and to be loved, but, as we know, most of the cages we live in are of our own making. A cage of silence, of semi-truths. We device boundries and project them, by reflex, onto others: “They’ll never understand, it is best to avoid”. Everytime that we gag our love we pervert the nature of our person. Even self-confidence comes out wounded in this pattern. Our dignity demands us respect.

I was in my bedroom when Serena looked in my eyes and confessed me: “Pasquale, I have tried to put on a scale denial on one plate and love on the other one. With love I mean firstly love towards myself and, secondly, to other girls.

Now, sometimes it happens that love does not weight much, and therefore the weight of oppression is not unbearable since the former is lighter than the latter. So the right choice to make does not always appear immediatly clear. The risk is that if we opt to remain in our little sheltered world, made of few trusted friends, hence never being free. And this to the detriment of others, because homosexuality will remain “virtual”: if we deprive our gay affections of a social an visible concreteness, they will cling on the stereotype of abandonment/illness, of the aberrant sexual practice that is preferred to normal intercourse and whatnot, in compliance with Freud’s psychanalisys. Do you know how many theories have been made? of biological, genetic and scientific nature?

“Heart examination”, I told her.

I know that it is imperative that our love be displayed. To share the joy of an exciting lesbian, gay or transexual love is a gift we are given and give to others. Perhaps the world would be better if we re-setted any bias and re-started it all over again with sheer self-awareness. God, if it wouldn’t!

We should keep in mind that our life lasts, at its best, around a hundred years. If we subordinate our love to others’ approval, what kind of life will we have… “lived”? What kind of love will we have experienced?

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